I understand. The mailboxes I’m talking about are only accessible to the mail carrier from the top. They slide the letters in from the top after unlocking and opening it to access all the units’ boxes at once, and then I open mine from the front. They would only be able to see the top edge of an envelope. A post-it note wouldn’t be visible. But they never look inside anyway, because these are incoming boxes only.

Yeah my bad, that can definitely be true depending on the credit union.

Many if not most CUs join a co-op of tens of thousands of fee-free ATMs, but depending on where you are and which CU you’re a member of, it may not help.

That article feels unfinished, but at least the author pushes back a little. Those numbers cannot possibly be true. And if they somehow are, based on my experience cleaning up that code will take nearly as long as a person writing it from scratch.

This only works for certain kinds of mailboxes, not the standard ones many apartments have that only open for the carrier from the top. The carrier has a key that opens the whole box from the top, they put the mail in that way. It’s only incoming mail, there’s no external slot to put outgoing mail. If there’s anything left in the box when they’re delivering, the carrier just assumes the resident hasn’t picked up the previous mail. They never take mail out of an incoming mailbox box.

Eh I guess it’s possible, but probably unlikely. You could always stick some tape on the sticky note if you’re worried.

I just replied to a similar comment, but here it is again since you replied while I was typing :)

Yeah, I have the same issue. I just keep the misdirected mail for a week or two until it stacks up and then drop it all in the nearest blue USPS mailbox, which is in the center of town. It’s annoying, but not a huge deal. Also I’ve read you shouldn’t write directly on the envelope, the post office prefers sticky notes so the original envelope isn’t defaced.

Yeah, I have the same issue. I just keep the misdirected mail for a week or two until it stacks up and then drop it all in the nearest blue USPS mailbox, which is in the center of town. It’s annoying, but not a huge deal.

Also I’ve read you shouldn’t write directly on the envelope, the post office prefers sticky notes so the original envelope isn’t defaced.

You should definitely switch to a credit union regardless. There are no downsides.

But fault for this kind of issue is shared between the previous resident and the bank. When someone moves, it’s their responsibility to change their address in all the various systems in which they exist and set up mail forwarding, which lasts for a year by default, and is free.

It is your responsibility to forward any misdirected mail you receive. The alternative is throwing it out, which is illegal. Just put a sticky note on the envelope that says something like “wrong address, return to sender” and drop it in any outgoing mailbox.

This is a pretty standard issue though. I lived at my previous apartment for more than 7 years, and I was still getting mail from the previous tenant when I moved out. People are so lazy.

I kind of get it in cases where no one has commented yet, and the OP realizes a mistake or how stupid a question it is. But once there’s engagement, I wish the OP would leave it up.

I’ve noticed this a lot lately: I’ll comment, my comment will get engagement, so I’ll check the thread again to reply or read other comments, do that, then come back later to follow up again, and it’s all been deleted. Like, even if the original post was stupid or embarrassing, the fact that there was genuine engagement, to me, means it shouldn’t be deleted.

But again, I understand the anxiety of leaving your own stupid words up if they really bother you, so I won’t lose sleep over this.

I bet that adorable dude can move.

I’ve been here a while, and that’s an awesome new sub for me.

This was an even more satisfying find because my beast of an elderly cat is loudly purring on my lap. Thanks softcat!

Oh yeah, that last point rings true for my dad too. My family hired a health aid to assist with our relative who he’s helping care for in home hospice, and we fought with him for weeks to defer to the aid’s expertise. He believes, despite the fact that this is literally her career, that he knows better how to take care of someone on their deathbed. Despite not having gone through it before, or having any medical or healthcare experience. He would snap at the aid for showing him how to do something.

We ultimately had to have a heart-to-heart with the aid to apologize for his behavior and to teach her how to use his own narcissism against him so he would do things the right way.

I think he’d be a grandiose narcissist. He truly believes he’s the best and can’t be wrong. And when someone calmly and carefully explains why he is wrong about a particular thing, his mood flips 180 degrees and he blows up and gets super defensive. If we don’t give up trying to convince him, his mood gets even more sour and he essentially mopes like toddler. This can be for anything, even the most trivial bullshit that wouldn’t phase anybody else.

And he does all that while bragging to anyone that will listen that he’s open-minded and loves being proven wrong.

I’m not a psychiatrist, so this is all observational for me, but my father is a narcissist so I can at least tell you what he’s like.

In conversation, or any interaction, if the topic veers into anything that my father can’t relate to or isn’t aware of from his own personal experience, he immediately reframes the topic so it’s about him. This consistently happens in the middle of a conversation, and it usually interrupts someone speaking. The interruption is always unrelated to what the person was actually saying, so after he interrupts you can always see the person he cut off deflate and shrink away from the conversation. Because it’s clear he wasn’t participating in a two-sided conversation, he was just waiting his turn to cut in and take over.

He manages to come across as caring, but that’s only because he knows exactly how to act so he appears that way. But his motivation is only to be praised for his apparent empathy, because if you probe his behavior even a little bit, it’s like a switch is flipped and he goes into a full on angry defensive mode.

For example, a close family member is dying, and he is the only one available to care for them. And he is taking care of them physically, don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that, but whenever another family-member asks for an update on their condition, his framing is always about what he has done and how he has learned what to do in a particular situation, it’s never about the condition of our dying family member.

He takes credit for every idea and new concept he comes across, even if the person who gave him the idea is in the room with him. It sometimes even happens in the same conversation.

Anyway, those are just my personal experiences living with an extremely difficult and selfish father who is incapable of thinking genuinely about other people. I learned a lot about myself and him by reading Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. Worth a read even if you’re not thinking about a parent.

Heh I will remember that! Thanks!

I’m sure I won’t find a fresh one, but I remember seeing something that looked like that at one of the local Asian supermarkets I spend way too much money at.

If you have a general interest channel that includes most/much or your company on slack or something similar, you could post links to articles that explain the problems with relying on chatbots or best-practices for using them in a professional setting, and hope the person in question sees it. That way you don’t have to call them out personally, and the whole company can benefit from a reality check on how these things should or shouldn’t be used.

No, I don’t think I’ve tried durian. I don’t recognize the name, but the fruit itself looks familiar, so I’ve definitely seen them around. I’ll pick one up the next time I see it!

Yeah, I never thought fruit could taste this good.

I have trouble remembering the names of the specific hybrids, but I believe that variety is called “Dapple Dandy” or “Dinosaur Eggs.” When I was was trying to find the name, I came across this photo of some of the varieties of hybrids. It’s wild how different they can be.

It’s almost stone fruit season in California!! My local farmers market was selling the very first batch of peaches last weekend, which means they’re coooming!

Can’t explain how excited this gets me. If you haven’t tasted a fresh pluot or some of the huge variety of hybrid stone fruit, you’re missing out on one of life’s greatest pleasures. They’re colorful, they’re sweet, they’re subtly sour, they’re juicy, and they have the most satisfying crunch. There’s so much variety, and some amazing genetic combos. You ever had a peach that looks like a green apple on the outside and is the color of a beet on the inside? Well that’s my most favorite goddamn fruit on the planet. Fuuck I’m getting too excited…

At the peak of stone fruit season, sometimes I’ll just chop up a bunch of different kinds of pluots and that’s my meal for the day. Not kidding. When I first moved here, this shit changed my life. Best fruit I’ve ever tasted.