Here’s some advice from someone with a high nat charisma role on birth:

Gaining friends, lovers, or even acquaintances isn’t a goal to be worked towards - rather - the best kinds of these relationships are byproducts of mutual interest and experiences.

If your efforts are only going towards showing up at social events to participate in small talk, then no wonder it feels like you’re coming home from work. Because that’s the same behavior expected at work.

This “social script” we’re expected to follow at work is to maintain social standing to get work done, rather than grow and deepen connections.

Basically, work socialization and personal socialization should be approached differently, and taking the work approach to your private life will likely lead to the same kind of relationships you’re building at work: simple and makes your work easier. (Rather than relationships that are deep, and make your life more colorful.)

Here’s something to try the next time you find a group you want to be a part of:

• 1st: Don’t talk about work itself. Talk about the actions you take at work. Don’t say, “I work in sales” say “I sell shit to those that don’t need it.”

Talk about the specific actions you take, in work or anywhere else, and personalize them.

The fundamentals of any relationship are built on the aligned behaviors of individuals. The easiest way to determine if the way you behave is similar to others is to talk about how you act. And if you can add in your own opinion about those actions, even better. These small things communicate who you are much better than anything else. Actions speak louder than words, so try your best to speak about yourself as the actions you take - use verbs to describe yourself, not nouns.

• 2nd: Don’t talk about yourself unless asked. Instead, engage with others to learn about them. Specially, what actions they like.

If you know someone is interested in something like bikes. Don’t ask what bikes they like, ask if they “like the thrill of downhill mountain biking,” or “prefer a chill bike ride through the park.”

Do they watch movies? Don’t ask “did you like that Movie?” Rather, ask “did you like pacing of that Movie?”

Verbs should also be at the heart of your inquiries into others, as they describe the actions others have that might align with yours.

That is - good relationships are built on mutual action, not mutual interest.

So don’t ask, “How was work?” ask “What projects are you working on?” Then follow that inquiry up with more specifics on their behaviour through that project - “How hard was the project to complete? Who got in your way?”

Basically, socialize as if the people you want to hang around are all the main characters within their own show. They have adventures, villians, love interests, etc - and just spending time learning what those are, will make them feel closer to you. Once you know enough about them, you can begin asking them about the events in their own show. That is, in time, your small talk will grow from, “how was work?” to “did you get your evil manager fired over their bullshit harrasment?”

And that’s the difference between a friend, and someone you know at work.

Eventually, when you learn about these people more, you’ll discover the behaviour they have that aligns with yours. And eventually, you’ll begin doing stuff together with them.

They like casual bike rides? Cool, give it a shot with them! They like seeing matinees on Sunday? Cool join em!

The more you show an interest in how people behave, the more likely it is they will want to include you as part of that behaviour.

• 3rd. Encourage others. Be their hype man.

You know how they act? Great. Encourage it. Sometimes, even encourage it with you included.

They love bike riding? Great. Tell them about the park near your house they should try. Heck. You can even join em.

People often have goals tied to their favorite behaviours. If you know what those goals are, you can encourage them to pursue them. When they succeed, you will now be a part of it they’ll remember.

In time, you keep up the above, you’ll be surrounded by people you know well, and whom you’ve shared a lot of activities with.

And they will without question enjoy you in their lives for it.

AI to run companies in sustainably profitable ways that benefits their workers instead of rich greedy sociopaths.

Our educations system has been in decline for the last 20 years. Instead foreign money has combine with private interests to blast us with complete made up bullshit propaganda 24/7. Almost all of our major news sources are now owned or operated by MAGA donors, who care more about money than public well being. Basically, half this country is now too stupid to determine if the information they’re viewing is corporate propaganda, or foreign government propaganda. Both are exploitative, and both want Americans sick because it’s profitable to them. So despite having a president that publicly threw out our pandemic response killing more Americans than in all the wars we’ve ever faught in combined - 4 years later we reelected him. That’s how bad the propaganda is here. Combined with poor education, we can no longer agree on how basic cause and effect works.

TL:DR - We’re now too stupid and hopped up on propaganda to understand how preventing diseases works.

I’m surprised I had to scroll this far to see Jinjer! Seriously impressive vocals, and absolutley one of my favorite female metal vocalists.

Been on Reddit for 15 years. Can confirm it’s pretty much a bot hellscape now.

Years ago I noticed the quality of front page posts drop in terms of their basic spelling and grammar. You never used to see typos in what hit the front page because mods actually cared about the quality of what was being posted to their subreddits.

That’s far past gone now in all the top subs. Mostly because the mods there have all been compromised as shills that get paid to gatekeep selected content from bot controlled posters. Now all they care about is volume rather than quality.

That’s why most of the default subreddits and most of what hits the front page is the same regurgitated content with dick-riding commentary that doesn’t discuss much aside from just agreeing with the upvoted group-think of the post itself.

Overall quality in all the top 100 subreddits has declined exponentially in just 5 years, as the mods now heavily favor bot accounts posting more, rather than community members posting gold less often. So the best members of most communities just left, as there was no reason to contribute content that wasn’t going to be seen against a flood of mod approved click bait.

Reddit is now a soulless faceless husk shambling around as if it’s content is from a real community of people, and not a corpo filtered humonculous.

Engagement there, the good kind. Is now rare at best, if at all. And even worse - I’ve found dozens of sites that will just let you buy upvotes and accounts, so making it to the front page just takes some clever marketing spend.

It’s sad to see such a colorful community of people from around the world get invaded and slowly taken over by a body-snatcher like corporate mimic - but that’s the best compliment I can give to what’s left of Reddit.

From Arizona / Mexico:

Birria, especially Birria Ramen. It’s slow cooked meat in a broth of spices and a bit of onion and Chiles. It’s fall apart tender, and usually served with melted cheese (Queso Birria). But my favorite version is served on top of Tapatio Ramen. So it’s fork tender beef with spicy noodles.

Really great on a cold day.

Funny thing is, I’m from the East Coast of the US, so actually have a bunch of favorites from there that are really worth giving a try too.

Especially a REAL Cheesesteak.

Shaved Ribeye cut thin and grilled on a hot surface for a char. Grilled and charred onions and green peppers. Add it to an Italian soft roll that’s warmed, NOT toasted. Melt on top of it either Cheez Wiz (an Aerosolized Cheese snack that’s awful by itself) or American cheese. Mix it all together on the bun along with a few slices of Italian peperonchinis and a couple dashes of celery salt.

Incredibly unhealthy, but quite an experience if you ever get to try one (or make one yourself! I’m literally eating one I made for dinner right now haha 😂)