My dad tried to get me to fly out to his place in California to fix his printer issues once. I live quite a few states away. He didn’t even offer to pay or anything, he just was like “you haven’t visited in a while and I really need your help, please come soon.” I told him to call the geek squad.

Haha, that’s a good idea, the next time I make a dad joke I’ll say, “oh no, was that a dad joke? You should probably take a pregnancy test, just in case it was.”

One time my wife (girlfriend at the time) and I went to pick up some condoms and then we decided to also get some ice cream and the cashier (older lady) gave us like a 3 second look and I thought she was gonna say something but then I said, “the ice cream’s for a friend” and it was the funniest thing I’ve ever said.

Wife still hasn’t forgiven me. Cashier didn’t say anything. My eyes were watering like crazy as I held in my giggles.