Dharma Curious (he/him)

That sounds amazing

I used to work at a place where the boss took the whole crew to lunch on Thursdays (about 10 of us), and no one liked lemons, so they’d all tell the waitress not to bring lemons with their water or tea. I would then ask the waitress for all of their lemons, and while those fools were getting full on bread waiting on their food, I would eat lemons like an absolute goblin. It was wonderful.

I didn’t either until recently. I knew that historically it hadn’t always been the case, and that it was a quirk of the Catholics, not something based in the early church, but until I found the Episcopal church and started learning more about liturgical Christianity, I had no idea.

Not all catholic priests have to be celibate! Eastern rite Catholics (around 1 percent of Catholics) are able to marry and have kids! Also, there’s something called the personal ordinate, where former Anglican priests can be ordained as catholic priests and Anglican parishes/congregations can be joined to the Catholic Church while retaining uniquely Anglican cultural and liturgical elements, and if the priest is already married they can still be ordained, even though they’re ostensibly within the western rite (the one where priests can’t marry), but AFAIK if they’re unmarried when they make the switch they cannot then get married.

Orthodox priests can also marry (but only before becoming priests. If unmarried when ordained, unmarried you must remain*), and are considered to be in full communion with the Catholics, and while I’ve never looked into it, I’m sure there’s something similar to the personal ordinate for them as well.

*I like this system better than western rite. Priests can marry but once they’re in that position of power over people they can’t. Because in theory at least, it’d be easy for an unmarried priest to take advantage of a parishioners they were sexually interested in, because there is such an inbalance of power between the two, like teacher/student but cranked up to 11. I personally like the Episcopal model

My grandmother was 11 when she got married to her first husband. Her folks married her off to a 35 year old man. Not my grandfather. His name was Bost. She never would tell anyone his first name, she never wanted to talk about him. Had one daughter with him and he died. Never officially married my grandfather, but had several kids with him years later, and everyone thought they were married. But she also had several kids from other men, and told everyone they were his, but even the kids she admitted to (she actually sold several of her children to various people, including a few family member. Sold my uncle twice and got him back both times) she gave them all different last names, but said they were all granddaddy’s.

She was crazy. Wonderful Grandma, mind you. But absolutely should never have had kids, violent woman with severe mental illness that mellowed out in her old age (mostly). So great grandma, but not a good mom. Used to wake the kids up randomly at like 3 in the morning on school nights and do white glove tests on their room, then lock herself in the bathroom with a butcher knife and scream at them through the door that she was going to kill herself because they were so ungrateful. One time she beat my aunt so badly she bled from her vagina for a couple days. When one of the daughters she sold showed up in adulthood, she was a deaf woman.grandma refused to acknowledge she was in the room, and then mocked her for making “those noises.”

I firmly blame all of that on her essentially being sold as a sex slave at 11 years old. Me and my mom also have a theory that Bost never really existed, and that it was her father who got her pregnant, but that’s entirely unsubstantiated. Just a theory. She had somewhere around 13 kids, but only admitted to 6 or 7, depending on the day.

I never feel awkward buying condoms. At the worst, it’s a boast that imma get laid. At best it’s normalizing safe sex for younger cashiers who may still be in that bareback or bust phase.

Now, enemas and lube? That’s awkward, that’s announcing to the world I’m a bottom. Lol

No! We will not let you go!

Honestly, it’s far too long since I’ve had some meat in my mouth. Y’all shit post got me downloading Grindr again, thanks a lot. My self esteem about to take a deeeeeep dive lol

Yes, because if he’s heavier, it’s grosser, because we’re children and we like to shame people based on their bodies.

Yeah, hunger genuinely sucks. A lot.

We’re okay now, though :)

A bottle from mad dog 20/20 from a gas station. I was like 15. Me and some buddies wanted to get drunk, none of us had fake IDs, and the weed dealer who normally supplied the booze wasn’t answering his phone. 5 of us went in, my buddy Brian volunteered to be tribute, and he grabbed a case of beer and just went to walk out the door with it. While the clerk was distracted dealing with that, we shoved mad dog in our pockets, and then went to the register with sodas. Brian dropped the case of beer and booked it. It was a very smooth operation.

Didn’t steal anything else for years, until I was like 18, and we were so poor that my mom and I started shoplifting out of genuine necessity, while waiting on her disability to kick in.

Oh, man, I used to steal all the shit from Walmart when I worked there. I’d go to the freezer section, grab something like a small box of hot pockets, and head to the break room directly for my break, straight skipping the register. Plus just, like, normal shoplifting, because fuck them

He tried to warn us! E=mc²

E(instein)=m(urdered)c(onspiracy)²