Weird enough for me, everyone around me knew/heavily suspected that I was autistic, would tease/mock my traits and proceed to flip out when I react. Only found out after I reached out with the suspicion that I might be autistic.
At least now I’m surrounded with more (seemingly) understanding people, even though I haven’t told them.
I’ve also been given the “I’ve always suspected” thing (not diagnosed) from certain people, family to be specific. And while, fair enough, so have I; when I start thinking about certain treatment and button pushing that I’ve gone through, and the fact that no one ever bothered to get me professionally assessed growing up so that maybe I could’ve had a better quality life; it makes my mind start going to dark places. And I don’t like it because maybe it’s all in my head.
Edit: although to be fair, I do believe that I have become quite unintentionally good at putting a mask on throughout the years. And maybe it’s only really starting to show now that I’m older and still the way I am.
My main fear was that they all knew 😖
