That’s a low bar, but importantly they’re still correct that technically Windows looks like it can handle those things as far as a regular consumer can see. Windows is unholy trash, but it at least doesn’t tell people who can’t even navigate their basic file explorer that they are expected to use scary terminal commands they likely found on a forum or third-party website.

Personally I think a little more tinkering spirit would do the whole world good, not just with computers, but reality is the way that it is for the moment(things can change, fingers crossed).

If someone did a horrific thing and then told me they weren’t as guilty as their boss I’d be fairly confident saying that if their first priority was to justify their actions then they can also get absolutely fucked.

The US was never really that against them. Their motivation in WW2 was not nearly as morally perfect as they like to pretend.

I’m not going to go refind the examples, but there have been stories about things soldiers do that are definitely not ordered by anyone else. There can be a level of cruelty at times that is completely on the individual and they cannot always hide behind “I was told to”.

And didn’t say anything about it? That’s also bad form, so maybe do that and explain what you changed.

Really displaying that low reading comprehension, eh?

If most people are vaccinated and we look at the rates of autism, and even decided that the only way for autism to exist is through vaccines, then they are correct that the likelihood of being autistic for this reason would be insanely low. Far less than, say, dying of any of the otherwise preventable diseases.

#StopDumbingThingsDownForIdiots. If you can’t understand this easy stuff then you need to catch up.

As you say, people would really rather watch their children and elderly family members die preventable, agonizing deaths than risk getting autism. Of course this also comes from their belief that these diseases aren’t that bad, and that they aren’t even common(because of the vaccines but they don’t understand that). They also think that all autism is the 100% low-functioning, non-verbal, violent kind which is just complete horseshit.

In short: They’re fucking stupid.

Yea, because that was a deflection and not what we’re talking about. You said that the US has stood for diversity but at every stage of its existence it has stood on the backs and necks of minorities and has struggled to even admit that it has a problem. Even the last admin was ok with Israel wiping out every Palestinian man, woman, and child and sure that’s across the world but if they’re chill with genocide that sets the bar LOW. And buddy have you SEEN how they disenfranchise minority voters? The gerry-mandering maps are fucking WILD. They don’t give a fuck about the people who, to them, are just cheap labour.

Also I live in Canada which beat the US to gay marriage by 10 years and is where many black people escaped the US to. We are far from perfect but at least we had a female prime minister for a few months and a brown guy with a turban leads one of our three major parties. We also have a huge homeless problem but at least they have access to healthcare, and as far as surface-deep things like restaurants are concerned we have just as much diversity in our cities as the US does(and just as much bland, franchised nonsense out of the cities). French is our official second language but the US only has English despite all its Spanish speakers and the fact that a lot of it is straight-up old Mexican territory.

Ok but how does any of that make it good? That’s being relativistic and we can do soooo much better than that, can’t we?

Do better than jerking off terrible people who are only “totally awesome” because they’re not as bad as some of the other options. Nothing is forcing them to be like that so they have no excuse, and the rest of my original point still stands that your opinion based on what you enjoyed to consume as a tourist is laughably out of touch.

That’s a lot of copium. The US has never really been a diverse place where everyone is equal, it just has very good marketing, brand recognition, and fairy open borders so people tend to move there. Plus with the world speaking so much English it’s fairly accessible.

A lot of the times that you see non-WASP culture in the US it’s just stuff that a tourist might enjoy like cheap food, music, and art, or landscapes that are actively being destroyed by weak governments. So yea, maybe the people who are there and struggling can put on a good show but that doesn’t make it a good place.

The first black person to go to public school is still alive and she’s not even that old. Being gay is still dangerous outside of cities(and even within them sometimes!). There are two different rule sets for white and coloured people that are clear to see. The rich are never punished for their crimes and that’s even when the Democrats, the best they can offer, have all the power to do something about it. They aggressively export regressive ideals to other countries, too.

It’s always sucked.

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And to continue your real life event thing, even just going outside and watching something happen can help get the ball rolling. It won’t be quite the same, like you said, but it won’t at all be a waste of time. Even going for a regular walk in a somewhat busy area can help, especially if you get to say high to a dog or something(which plays into your interaction thing).

I mean, I would hope insurance doesn’t need to pay me. That imply I’ve involved in an accident or had my stuff stolen. Even a not for profit insurance company would operate like that. I can afford $100/mo but I cannot afford to replace not only my car but the car or property of whatever I may be found at fault for hitting(and if I get hit, can that person afford to pay me?). If I got into an accident, especially if I were younger, how would I replace my $5,000 car and the $70k BMW I just hit? What if my kid set my house on fire or what if fire leapt from my neighbour’s house to mine?

That said, it’s absolutely true that system is bloated to an absolutely disgusting level and its shocking lack of regulation for, as you say, being legally required is pitiful. It deplorable that people need to fight to get payouts sometimes and how the US uses it for healthcare is just hellish. It’s also true that the capitalist/libertarian ideal of insurance only really works if people are paid adequately but both those systems do fuck all, on purpose, to keep people’s financial security safe.

In Québec, liability is paid for by the province so our car insurance is a lot cheaper and regular insurance only needs to cover the physical property, so that’s nice. It’s still got it’s problems I’m sure, but it’s a step in the right direction.

“Robot arms!”

Because they lost their limbs in an avoidable industrial mining accident because safety was too expensive.

“But look at ‘em!”

Bruh.

Halloween party sounds like a time haha

I hear ya on the suddenly being grumpy thing. When it happens to me I’ve started going “sorry, I’m just a little turned around by [thing]”. I remember one time almost exactly a year ago at my friends’ place where I was feeling kinda weird so I went and did the dishes. One of my friends broke off and came over like “hey! Guests don’t do dishes!”(he wanted to be a good host and was worried that I had felt obligated to help). I told him that really I just needed a quiet moment and to feel useful more than anything and it was all chill. The more I’ve gotten used to just saying I’m off balance/feeling funky/a bit ramped up/whatever else the more I’ve been able to feel safe closer to the edge of those feelings. Hell, there are times with the right people where I even feel ok if I need to be in the “danger zone” because there will be a safety line. If your friends don’t let you take a break then that’s on them, not you.

Any kinda note works! Mine was just in the notes app on my phone but whatever lets you most easily start writing is the way to go. Could be that app function, could be a scheduled time or allowing yourself to enter stuff as the day goes on, a mix, whatever. Also Logseq looks cool, I may have to grab that and try it out!

Well, firstly, big hug my dude. And thanks for being vulnerable with me here, I appreciate it and you’re sounding just fine!

I get what you mean. You get so used to doing it that you basically no longer have evidence for things being ok when you don’t. I kept a note going every day for a whole year writing down stuff that happened; It was like a journal but focused on working on this stuff and I was so surprised to find how much I was expecting to write “and then it all fell apart” but finding that when it came time to write it down I just couldn’t actually come up with examples. I’m not saying you have to journal, but food for thought.

It’s also important to not worry about needing to expose deeper thoughts right out the gate. I’m very much the kind of person who just goes pedal to the metal but when I think about what I like to see in my friends it’s mostly that what they do share is honest and not that they need to share a lot. Like, you don’t necessarily need to tell me about your philosophy of life within the first five minutes but if you think bugs are cool or have a strong opinion about olives frickin’ send it, my guy. And hey, if you’re nailing it 95% of the time those are excellent numbers with so much wiggle room! You can be waaaaaaay weirder with numbers like that, and it shows me that you have a strong ability to read the room and measure your response to things.

You obviously care a lot about people and wanting to respect them so here’s something I heard about a year ago that kinda stuck with me for a similar reason: ‘When we decide for other people what they think of us, deciding for them that they think we’re weird and don’t like us, we’re being pretty unfair to them and not just ourselves.’ If they really do feel that way then ok, but we have to let them tell us that, ya know?

Also thanks for letting me ramble. I tend to get excited when I seem to be helping in some way so I’m trying to keep it together but may go off a little.

Hell yea dude, I so 100% understand that.

When I found that I was being judgemental and closed(and a bit of a stick in the mud, if I’m honest) I just tried to practice doing more “yes, and” stuff. It may be different for you but for me I realized that a lot of what was holding me back was plain old insecurity. I was simply afraid of being vulnerable to that level and so terrified of the chance someone would try to use any error I might make against me that I would get defensive when someone felt at least safe enough to try to give some feedback.

Being authentic is hard at first because it requires being vulnerable and, friend, I so get why that’s easier said than done. I’d worry less about being something so set-in-stone like a himbo and more about remembering that you’re allowed to be more than a mold filler. Like when you see a character who’s normally a little silly step aside with another and drop some calm wisdom and you go “oh, this person is more than their trope” or when the normally crazy barbarian type character shows softness when it’s needed. It’s situational, ya know? It’s not masking to turn down one knob and turn up the other when it’s appropriate.

The best part is that even if you strike out making friends or whatever you can at least say that you were a good, authentic person during it all. No one can ever take that away from you but you, and you control you.

—

It’ll be hard at first, to take what may feel like such a big risk, but I believe in ya and I can tell you genuinely care so you’ll get it for sure. Start small and build up and you’ll get there sooner than you think :)

The first day at the gym is the hardest, but without any other context I will take your word for it. For most people, though, that is the way.

For me, I’m pretty ADHD with definitely some other shit mixed in and I’ve just come to accept that many people are not worth it. That said, so many people are and it just takes finding them. I was lucky to not get traumatized into masking as a child, though, and while it makes working with emotionally bankrupt engineers tricky I can at least survive out in the world in the context of making friends.

I’m curious what a “personality gym” would do for you, as you brought it up. At some point you’d be aiming to take those skills outside, right, so would it be in preparation for the going out and talking to people part? Or would you like to have a personality in isolation and at that point why the gym?

There is, it’s going outside and talking to people. Also therapy.

Big on the community forming part. I’m pretty good at treating where I live as a community but I’m lucky that others have made it easy here and we still have a lot of work to do in so many places in the world to make it happen more consistently. This is step one, the buying a gun thing is later once average Joe actually feels invested.

Stuff like helping people who get stuck in the snow and being the “weirdo” who waves to your neighbours is a good start, but I really wish there was a better way that did some of the legwork and got even those who wouldn’t normally look for it to see it and be a part. We can ask people to fight over and over but if they don’t even know who the person beside them is they will feel too alone to risk their lives like that(I mean, it’s the whole basis for why unions are a good thing, right?). North America, in so many places, is just a bunch of individual houses where people go to sleep and ignore the world after needing to go elsewhere for work.

I’ll give organized religion one thing and that’s making people actually mingle and exist with their neighbours but even that was essentially done under a form of duress(go to church or go to hell) so I’m not sure how we can get folks to actually show up for community events reliably. Fuck, in too many places here in Canada you can’t even get people to do better than less than a 50% voter turnout for major elections.

Anyway, thank you for responding with actionable things.