Hey that’s valid! A good friend of mine has the exact same thing. He’s up front about it, he apologizes when it’s excessive, and he’s more than happy to explain why it’s difficult for him. It’s just a thing, and if I’m going to be his friend, that means accepting it about him.

In other words, he’s done his best to help me understand him. Now it’s my turn to not be an asshole.

This is true! But there’s a very easy way to tell the difference.

When you find out you hurt someone’s feelings, do you apologize, express how terrible you feel about it, and try to do better? Not an asshole.

Do you double down, make excuses, and blame them for feeling bad? Asshole.

Saying the wrong thing doesn’t make you a jerk. Not caring about other people’s feelings, does.

Maybe not documented as such, but it’s understood to be correlated (especially in terms of “risky behaviors”), likely by way of chronic understimulation.

In layman’s terms: brain never gets the reward chemicals it needs > sex is a reliable source of reward chemicals > okay we’re obsessed with it now