Naaaaaaants, ingoyaaaamaaaaaa, ba-gi-thi baba

No implication intended. I’m not a bad guy. I would never fuck a lioness that didn’t want it, but that’s just the thing. Everything I know about them leads me to believe they’re jonesin’ for it, but I’m not a biologist.

What can you tell me about coquettish lionesses? Are they as soft and smooth as my friend has imagined?

The Catholic Footnotes author, blobfish article progressing most-unexpectedly:

Definitely. Also possible that having sex in grass sometime would blow my mind in ways I couldn’t comprehend.

Fine, I’ll just quote from the blog hosting that photo (checks notes…catholicfootnotes.com, wtf?):

The very existence of such a creature raises pressing questions, some practical (life application) and others more scientific or theoretical (as G.K. Chesterton once said, “every question is a theological question”). Life application questions might include: Does this thing swim near the shore? Might I encounter the Blobfish on my next tubing adventure? Would the Blobfish survive in my massive aquarium? More (or less) scientific questions might be: Is that a nose? Is the Blobfish nearing extinction? Does the Blobfish live near the bottom or top of the oceanic food chain? And the question everyone is asking: What’s up with those lips?

Okay, but hear me out.

Just spill it, you kinky freak, what is it? Fat cartoon animals? Differently-abled Schoolhouse Rock puppets? This is a no-judgment zone (speaking only for myself, mind you).

Okay, hear me out, it’s not what you think! More power to those who have, but I swear I’ve never even dressed like a cat.

But I mean goddamn gurl…right? Guys?

If he’s into documentaries, see if he might like the Adam Curtis documentary HyperNormalisation.

Damn, OP BLASTED the news outlets!

Great suggestion.

I think a lot of wholesome movies would become horrifying if you gave the characters massive, hairy dongs really flopping about in every scene. I’m thinking the likes of:

• Paddington
• My Neighbor Totoro
• Monsters Inc
• ET
• The Wizard of Oz

Really most movies, the more I think of it.

Does it explain how or why there are so many Marios?

Why would you do this when the functionality is built right in?

1. Open Photoshop
2. Select the Ellipse Tool
3. Draw a Circle of Your Choosing
4. Press Print Screen on Your Keyboard
5. Voila! A Fresh Circle to Paste/Insert Into Your GIMP Project!

Did they not offer a deep-dish Pepperoni Lovers option?

I worked for an investment firm that had about 75 employees, but managed $35 billion in assets. There are a lot of those. Their investments tended to be a lot of the companies ruining the world, ranging from the privatized ambulance companies to the privatized hospice care companies to the emerging-market banks, etc…etc… And that’s just one “small” investment firm.

Why do you want to dress like a European king/aristocrat? If anything, creating vests was where we went wrong. Now capes…

Given how accurate that movie was, it seems possible Hugo Weaving is actually the whole problem.

Kindly refrain.