a nightmarish scenario came to reality for me yesterday!
so - a month ago, my brother got me an interview for a place that I was really looking forward to starting with. as soon as I got the call for the interview, I mentally noted the date - “28th! let’s do this! I’ll be so prepared!” I spent some time getting some basic notes ready, then went off to easter break to see family before refining my notes and preparation in earnest.
except, it wasn’t on the 28th. it was on the 22nd. which I didn’t find out until the morning of, 15 minutes before it was happening, thanks to my brother messaging me wishing me luck. I called them to apologise and begged them to schedule me in later - they gave me 30 more minutes. I cried the whole way getting there, then bombed the interview. I got my rejection pretty swiftly, and I’m so devastated.
how the hell does this happen?? this isn’t even the first time I’ve conjured fantastical dates for appointments and events! I even had my confirmation email to reference, which I just immediately decided was still set for the date that I believed it was. I’ve always felt upset at how disorganised and absent-minded I am, and it’s hard to not see this as a massive character failing. how can I hope to bounce back from something like this? things like this really make me feel like incapable of operating like a normal human being.
Stop relying on your mind and rely on things like the email itself and/or a calendar app.
Plenty of people need to take notes and use calendars and alarms to keep track of their scheduled events. You just have the amazing adhd privilege of needing to get used to that practice before you’re swamped with more work meetings than is sensible.
yep… lesson well learned
I know that feeling. Every date for appointments i have to immediately write down and double check for time also, or it’s as you described remembered wrong later or isn’t remembered at all. When seeing an appointment is set for 8 am it’s always suspicious because thats thr defsult time for appointments on my calender and i perhaps forgot to note the right time at all
As others have said, I would get it written down somewhere asap. In the future, you could ask to have an email sent to you to confirm the date, time, location, interviewers, and any other details like who to contact with questions/rescheduling. Plus they might also share hints like dress code, projected length, and expected types of questions that can help you prepare but might look bad if you explicitly asked for them.
If I was a recruiter, I wouldn’t think less of you for asking for confirmation. Rather, it makes you seem professional and prudent to want to avoid mix-ups like what you just experienced, that you have a legitimate interest in the position, and that you value your interviewers’ time as well as your own. Even if you have a sharp memory, this sort of thing can easily happen just from someone mishearing or misspeaking on the phone.
Good luck with the job hunt. You get better at it with experience, but even then, it’s mostly a numbers game. Don’t let a rejection get you down, every new application is a fresh start with more experience.
I actually did get an email confirmation for the date, time and place. and I confidentially just kept the wrong date in mind anyway 🥲 really painfully frustrating!
thanks! I’ve stopped beating myself up over my mistake and am just moving on to the next.
I’m sorry this happened. I know it feels really terrible right now, but I hope another great opportunity comes your way and that you feel prepared when it comes.
A practice that I find helpful is repeating back what I thought I heard. This gives evidence to the other person you are paying attention and provides an opportunity for immediate corrections if I got something wrong.
I also agree with other people of not depending on your brain. Computers are very good at remembering precisely what you tell them. They also offer reminders for variable amounts of time before. I have had Google calendar events with reminders set for 1 week, 1 day, and 1 hour before a single event.
Use a good calendar either physical or synced between devices. Eight everything down immediately. Solved!
Also, 45 minutes before an interview is plenty of time to prep. Next time tell yourself you can do it.
solid advice…! I used to keep a bullet-journal diary but I completely fell off of it this year and used no replacement. I suppose I should use my phone calendar like everyone else.
is 45 minutes really enough??! I’m not particularly gifted with interviews to begin with and would have really liked the prep time :-(
Are you selfhosting anything? Asking for what I should rec.
Journaling everyday really helps me. I constantly fell off when I gave myself rules of how the journal should be. Having a super easy format and giving myself the freedom to write whatever made it easy to write everyday and love it.
You might try a calendar or to do/reminders app as well. For instance iPhones reminders app is good because it will auto write the time based on what you type. I find this VERY convenient when making tasks and events.
Personally I somehow work really well with a fire under my rear. I delay forever until I’m forced to do the task then I am able to lock in. It’s either that or fail. Assuming you already knew the basics of the company and interview I think it’s achievable :) But, that’s how I work. I totally understand going into panic mode and freezing. We all work differently.
But I think you should take this as a learning opportunity to schedule and take notes better and have a easily changeable interview script ready to go :)
Literally just happened to me. My kids field trip, that I am chaperoning, is tomorrow. I had it down in my calendar for the day after. You have my sympathy.
gah! good thing you caught it! (unless you took off work on the wrong day?)
Both. Took a half-day for the original date. Had to cancel that and take a half-day for the correct day instead.
